El NUEVO PokéRAP: Una tierna historia de amor…

Cuenta la leyenda, que cuando la noviecita de White Licorice lo dejó por andar metido hasta el fondo en la Poké-adicción, éste se puso tan triste que le escribió esta canción…

No se si la compuso en la Pokéflauta o que… pero tan bien HAT.  El man menciona a los 151 Pokémones originales.  Chéckala después del salto… ahí también te dejo la letra para que la cantes, tu sabes, como hacías con el PokéRAP original.

So uh, my last girlfriend left me cuz she said I’m immature.
So I wrote this song for her…

So I got this girl to seps, Nidarina
Getting ready to put my poke flute inbetween her
First I take it Slowbro, you know play it Tentacool
When I Poliwag my Weedle oh how it makes her drool

I’m hard as a rock and this girl seems hooked on Onix
Because she puts her Meowth on my Pidgey and takes it like a bong hit
Then she startin to Machoke which isn’t very cool
I don’t wanna risk the Chansey of being Tentacruel

With the greatest swiftness I slide off her Kabutop
And make her great Para’s come unleashed and drop
She’s Seaking to Beedrilled while I’m hoping she’s infertile
Playing with those Jigglypuffs trying Venonat to Squirtle

Exeggcute that foreplay now I’m ready to Cuebone
Trying to finish quickly before her Mr. Mime gets home
But she stops, before I can start the Mankey pankey
And says «Since I had to Staryu, you have to Starmie»

So since she did me, I guess I have to Ditto
I get down on my knees and Ponyta Pidgeotto
Give her a Slowpoke before I dive into that girl
And attack her Cloyster with a full Poliwhirl

I Lickitung her Lapras tasting on that Magikarp-et
Hoping she’s not Krabby, that’d be Gastly and would make my heart sick
Yes that Persian rug is Clefairy but I didn’t really mind
Since I could ring the Victreebel I was getting some behind.

Down there so long, I come up Koffing and Weezing
I got her Seel of approval though cuz she’s Growlithe-ing and breathing
Wanted to Graveler feeling so Sandshrew
And giver her an Electabuzz with my Spearow too

I’d tell you her name, but don’t think she’s a Horsea
Not too many get a Rapidash, tonight she’s just Rhyhorn-y
So I start Rhydon like a Machamp, feeling like I could roar
Going so hard that I probably made her Ivysaur

She wanted my Arbok so I gave her Garydos
Going so hard that my Mew almost Tauros
Inside that Butterfree feeling like Charmeleon bucks
Constantly Jolteon her with the power of my Psyduck

Now I must’ve gone and Jynx-ed it, somwhere in the equation
Cuz she started getting Drowzee during the copulation
I didn’t even notice, I kept going at her Golbat
But something seemed Oddish when I started hearing her Snorlax

I tried to waker her up, Zubat she was Porygon
And she’d have to be awake before I’d get my Flareon
Of course I felt Gloom, I thought I had been Charmander
And now I can’t Grime her Voltorb or I’ll be harming her

My Dewgong can’t Muk and if he does it’d be rude
But this is still better than the time I brought home a Geodude
With my pants down, my Bellsprout-ed, I feel like I had to Duduo
So I Marowaked into the bathroom and when I leave what do I view?

My girl’s awake a-Gengar which seems kinda Farfetch’d
And provokes a Poliwrath at the thought that she fake slept
I asked her what was wrong does she not like it when I Pinser
And she responded with «Calm down a second Spencer»

If you think your sex is good you’re wrong. If you think you’re Hypno
The only thing you’re good at is Nintendo
I love this girl a Magneton and hearing this was Wigglytuff
The Eevee-ning had started out well but now is turning rough

Told her wait a Parasect, please stay the Omanyte
You’re my Goldeen girl and if you leave I Magnamite
E-Ratticate my life because you are my Fearow
It’s too early in the night to give me the Kabuto

And she says «Way back when when I first took a Picachu
I thought you were kinda cute and that you might want my Mewtwo
I felt Electrodes in the air when I saw you and you saw me
But that was before I knew your Diglett was so Dratini

I didn’t know the size of my Dodrio mattered, and my god
I thought we were like two Caterpies in a Metapod
I hope the memories of me Haunter I hope she never leaves her Shellder
I hope you Seadra light soon and I go and tell her

I know you think you’re hot shit, but I’m actually Exeggutor
I’m the Omastar, the Kingler, I can find another sooner
I’m sorry about the time I gave you Wartortles and blisters
Or when I suggested a Dugtrio with your sister

But if you still wanna go, leave, I won’t beg like Arcanine
Golduck with your new life, I’m having a Blastoise with mine
And that was the night Misty left me. I felt so Vileplume
I r-Ekans that Dragonite was the beginning of the doom

But I guess men are from Magmar-s. Women are from Venusaur
And everything Tangela-ble there’s a reson for
I learned this the next week when bad news filled the Dragonaire
My heart got Machopped in half like a Scyther giving a tear

A phone call from her mother told me a Kakuna in her head
Had attached to her Vulpix and now Misty was dead
I thought it was a Clefable that those were Hitmonlee-thal
I’d heard eight or Ninetails about Golem from different people

But I still couldn’t believe it. I started Weepingbell-tin out tears
Cut-Sandslashs Vaporeon eyes and all of our ears
It was like Raichu-no, Zapdos, Moltres and she’s gone
And I can’t Abra Kadabra. Miss a magic wand.

No Alakazahm and she reappears. I feel like a Primape.
They could’ve caught the growths but the Kangaskhan-s came back too late
I Pidgeot to have know better but the news was quite Charizard
My heart felt Bulbasaur plus permanently scarred

She was my Nidoqueen. I should not have Nidoran.
I wanted to be her Nidoking but I felt more like a Hitmonchan
If I hadn’t been around, would she still be with us?
Or is my pokelove just too damn Venemoth

Inside I’m like the Artecuno, that feeling
A gun Rattata my heart, and I’m just waiting for the healing
But I don’t regret getting hit by Cupid’s Aerodactyl
Relationships are like Pokemon, you gotta catch ‘em all.
……Nidarino……